If She Tried

She is that girl

Who catches her coat

On the door handle.

She would not be able

To do it if she tried.

She is that girl

Whose feet find

The one paving stone

To trip over.

She would not be able

To do it if she tried.

She is that girl

Who brushes her teeth

And leaves toothpaste

Around her mouth

Before walking to work.

She would not be able

To do it if she tried.

She is that girl

Who when she gestures

Knocks over a drink

And drenches her neighbour

In a shower of beer and

Mops up with her jumper.

She would not be able

To do it if she tried.

She is that girl

Who wears yesterday's clothes

And gets to the library

Before she realises

The waft of perspiration

And the dark brown stain

Near her crotch.

She would not be able

To do it if she tried.

She is that girl

Who thinks about others

And what they think

Scared of their thoughts

Embarrassed at her actions

That provoke laughter

So she must laugh

At herself.

She would not be able to do it

If she tried.